🏠 "This Is My House" — A Birthday Reflection at 46

By Deryl Richardson | #WatchMeRise

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Another year.
Another month.
Another day.

But today? I turn 46.

And for the first time in a long time, I’m not just reflecting on where I’ve been — I’m fully standing in who I’ve become.

This birthday feels different. Not because of the number, but because of the man behind it. I’ve carried so many versions of myself through life. The boy who survived, who showed up for everyone else, who gave more than he received. He was strong. He was resilient. But he was never supposed to stay forever.

This year, I’m letting him rest.

I'm stepping into the man that God created me to be — whole, powerful, and unapologetically rooted in my purpose. No more shrinking. No more proving. No more permission slips.

I dressed up this year, not for attention, but to honor the glow-up I fought for. To remind myself that the healing is the celebration. That the breakthrough is the style. That rising is the reward.

I’ve learned that true growth requires release — of roles, expectations, and old love that can’t reach you anymore. And to those who still don’t know how to love themselves… I see you. But I won’t bend for you.

“I will always love you, but I’ll never expect you to love me when you don’t love yourself.” — Beyoncé, My House

That line sits deep in my spirit. Because I’ve tried to carry others while carrying my own pain. I’ve waited for understanding that never came. But not anymore.

This is my house. I built it. I own it. And I walk through it like I deserve to be here.

So today, I’m not just putting on a show —
I am the show.

I have always been the show.

I will always be the show.

Happy Birthday to me!

🕯️ Journal Prompt for You:

What parts of yourself are ready to rest… so that your next chapter can rise?

✨ Ready to rise with me?

If you felt this message — visit the Watch Me Rise Store to explore gear, journals, and affirmations that reflect your own journey.

Every product is designed to celebrate resilience, reinvention, and the bold choice to keep going.

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Sometimes I Have to Water Myself

There’s a quiet truth I’ve learned during recovery: sometimes, I am both the garden and the gardener.

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This short reel captures one of the quietest, most powerful moments of my recovery—choosing to pour into myself when no one else could. Watch the full video below, then read the reflection that inspired it.

I spent years hoping someone would see I was parched. I whispered my needs, softened my voice, and made myself small—hoping someone would notice I was running on empty. That love would show up and pour into me.

But healing doesn’t always arrive through someone else’s hands.

There are days I walk outside, neck brace on, heart heavy, body aching… and I water my plants. Slowly. Silently. Tenderly. And in that moment, I realize—I’m really watering myself.

I’m showing up for myself.
I’m choosing softness.
I’m making space for peace.

This is what rising looks like when no one is clapping.
It’s what healing sounds like when the world is loud, but you choose quiet anyway.

If you’re in a season of becoming, I hope you remember: the most beautiful things grow in silence.

Even you.

💭 Journal Prompt:
Where in your life have you been waiting for someone else to pour into you? How can you begin to water yourself today?

👉🏾 This reflection pairs with the Healing Through Reinvention journal prompt “Pouring from a Full Cup”—available now inside the Watch Me Rise Journal.

Take your time.
Breathe through it.
And if you’re ready, write your way through it.